


Aftermath

by fawnbinary



Series: Possession [8]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-09
Updated: 2016-12-09
Packaged: 2018-09-07 11:14:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8798734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fawnbinary/pseuds/fawnbinary
Summary: He wants to tell him he’s perfectly fine, wants to say that what just happened was amazing, mind blowing sex. Not what it was. Scary, overwhelming… He can’t even think the word. It will make it real.





	

**Author's Note:**

> newest installment of possession to help everyone after that last one! enjoy!!

He’s not good.

Oikawa leaves him for just a few seconds to stand, and he shakes. His thoughts are a jumbled mess until Oikawa touches him again, wrapping him in a blanket and picking him up like he’s the most fragile thing ever touched.

Maybe he is.

Sugawara hides behind the blanket when Oikawa takes him out to the hall, walking quickly towards the showers. Once there, he sets him down gently.

“Suga,” He sounds a little worried, “Are you okay?”

He wants to tell him he’s perfectly fine, wants to say that what just happened was amazing, mind blowing sex. Not what it was. Scary, overwhelming… He can’t even think the word. It will make it real.

“No.”

He hears Oikawa suck in a breath and feels numb.

“Suga- Koushi, come here.”

It’s not a command like earlier. It almost sounds like a plea. He hesitates, fingers clenching and unclenching anxiously, but finally moves from the blanket, stands on shaking legs. The movement amplifies his soreness. Oikawa takes a slow step towards him, fingers reaching out cautiously, like he’s afraid to scare Sugawara away if he moves too quickly.

He might.

“Suga.”

He cups his face with one hand gently, smooths his fingers over his skin and through his hair in a familiar motion. Comforting. Sugawara leans into it, needs it.

“Do you want me to leave you alone?”

He has to think about it, really. Does he? The thought of being around him right now is… scary. Less so than before, with all of the soft touches, but still scary.

But the thought of him leaving, of being alone, it’s. Worse. Has his breathing picking up just a shred, but Oikawa notices. He notices everything. Cringes away from him.

Sugawara startles, hands flying out to grab him, any part of him, grasps his shirt and holds tight.

“N-no, don’t leave me.” He whispers. Can’t bring his voice to be any louder.

But Oikawa listens, draws closer to him. Wraps warm arms around him and presses sweet kisses to his face. Doesn’t go near his lips.

He holds him until Sugawara relaxes, then pulls back, just an inch. Tells him quietly that he’s going to turn on the shower. He’ll be right there. Promise.

Sugawara watches him, blanket dropping away from his body and he doesn’t notice, even when he shivers.

He knows he needs to talk, to let Oikawa into his mind and show him what he’s thinking. But he’s so scared. What if he really leaves?

“Suga.”

He blinks up at the face suddenly in front of his. He’s as bare as Sugawara now, and offers him a soft smile and his hand, leading him into the shower and drawing the curtain back to shield them away. His body goes limp under the steaming water. He lets Oikawa touch him, fingers pulling through his hair to help it soak, then brushing down his body over every mark he left. He kisses them all, sweet and soft and apologetic. Stops only when he’s on his knees in front of Sugawara, head resting on his hip.

He’s shaking, Oikawa is. Sugawara tries to pull his head back, tries to look at his face and see what’s wrong, but he refuses. Then he hears it, the quiet whimpering, soft cries.

“Oikawa,” He won’t look up at him still, so Sugawara tries something else. “T-Tooru. Please.”

That gets his attention, shoulders tensing up but finally his head draws back, face turning up.

He’s a mess, eyes red and full of tears.  
“I’m s-sorry, Koushi, I’m so, so sorry.” He cries.

Sugawara is at a loss. He’s never- Oikawa’s never cried like this, never looked so hurt and sorry in his life. He drops down beside him, gritting his teeth against the ache in his back, pulls Oikawa’s face close to his. Sugawara kisses his lips then, chaste and full of emotion. Stays pressed against him like that until Oikawa stops crying, then he pulls back.

“It’s not okay.” He wants to tell him it is, make him happy and okay, but he can’t, he needs this, can’t keep forcing himself. Getting forced. “It’s not okay, you hurt me. You need to- need to know when to stop.”

Oikawa nods swiftly, look down at the tile between them.

“You- you’ve always done that, said no but been okay with it. Before, when you’ve… cried like that, I d-didn’t know you really wanted to stop this time.”

He doesn’t say anything immediately. Oikawa’s right, he’s done it in the past, fighting it but not entirely wanting it to stop. But this time had been different, he’d been scared, needed it to stop. How is he supposed to differentiate between them?

“You need a word, like a, uh, a safeword?” Oikawa starts again, talking hurriedly, like he’s starting to panic, “Then I’ll know, I’ll know if you really want me to stop, I’ll stop, I promise I will-”

“Tooru.”

His mouth clicks shut. Oikawa looks up at him, blinking against the spray from the shower, and Sugawara nods. Kisses him again.

“I’m so sorry, Koushi.”

They stand together, and Sugawara leans against him, head on his chest. He’s okay now. They’ll be okay.

“It’s okay.” And he is this time, really. “I forgive you.”

**Author's Note:**

> thanks a bunch to atlas and sugay for the suggestion of a safeword!! i look forward to seeing more of your comments! <3
> 
> leave me some comments though, i love talking to people and love ideas!


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